Surefire Kidstuff
Surefire Kidstuff
By Cesare A.X. Syjuco [Video Troll]
Published in: The Manila Times, November 09, 1987
THE Beta or VHS machine can be a weary mother's best friend. Not only does it keep the kids and the tangles out of Mom's hair, but it also gives Mom a definite say in the kind of programming that goes into Junior's head. That's a whole lot safer than television, and sometimes more effective than a good book, or even a good spanking. By popular demand, here's another list of surefire kiddie titles readily available at better tape shops:
RUMPELSTILTSKIN – Those of us who thought for sure that costumed musicals went out with bible epics and Cinerama had better look again! This 1987 adaptation of Grimm's immortal fairytale may yet bring the genre back in vogue. And with the current public yen for fantasy flicks, who knows where a fullscale revival might take us? Starring a golden-tressed Amy Irving as the braggart-woodsman's daughter, the film itself is well above-average, even as the songs are definitely out to lunch. But with all the razzle-dazzle pageantry and modern laser optics to hold them spellbound, odds are that the kids will never know the difference.
DIGBY – All the world loves a big, furry dog – and this one happens to be 11-storeys high! A bowl of yum-yums laced with a top-secret growth formula turns a vagabond mutt into a tree-stomping colossus. The army, which owns the patent on this experimental concoction, wants to wipe him out with nuclear weapons, but not if Digby's growing legion of fans have their way in the matter. Definitely one quirky movie BIG on entertainment and laptime jollies.
THE LEGEND OF THE DINOSAURS – The Japanese have always had a way of outliving their initial notoriety, and their stranglehold-monopoly on toys, electronics, and high-fashion apparel has taken a big bite off kiddie animation and sci-fi films as well. This recent full-length creature-feature takes the cue from those vintage Hollywood B-movies of the 50's and 60's, with a pair of huge, prehistoric reptiles hatched from deep-freeze to eventually wreak havoc on a coastal town's skeptical inhabitants.
JACK THE GIANT KILLER – A golden oldie no less, the special effects in this mega-fantasy are commendable for a movie of its time – featuring a six-toed horned cyclops, a band of bat-faced winged marauders, and a ferocious two-headed ogre among other gory treats. A simple miller's son slays a giant to save a princess, and soon has his hands full as the realm's "official giant-killer." It's a little startling when hero and villain dish out a musical number every now and then, but otherwise, the thrills and spills far outweigh the camp.
BRIDE OF BOOGEDY – This light-hearted, spooky rejoinder to the "Mr. Boogedy" series of kiddie thrillers is cleverly played-out in the invariably wholesome Disney manner. And that fierce pilgrim spirit with the magic cloak is back from the great beyond in search of a mate – a kind-of ill-tempered Frosty The Snowman with a lockjaw sneer.
TOM THUMB – Everyone knows that Russ Tumblyn is petite, but thumb-size is still another matter! An elderly peasant couple is blessed with their fondest wish: to have a son "no matter how small". Tumblyn's excessive display of his famed dancing prowess is at least a trifle longwinded even for a song-and-dance movie of the 50's, yet the magic of macro-vision holds it all together even when our patience wears thin. Co-stars a strangely-youthful Peter Sellers as Tom's simpleminded go-between.
ALLADIN – Big Bud Spencer plays a moralizing genie in this recent re-make set in the 1980's. Although the dialogue is outrageously Italian, and the better stunts are few and far between, your kids will love the slapstick even as mine did.
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Cesare A.X. Syjuco, “Surefire Kidstuff” (page 1 of 1), The Manila Times, November 09, 1987
