New Arrivals
New Arrivals
By Cesare A.X. Syjuco [Video Troll]
Published in: The Manila Times, November 02, 1987
IN the local video trade, hardly anything is really new unless it's illegal. Apart from TV-movies and an occasional film from, say, New Zealand or Yugoslavia, only that which is much too old to be of any value to local distributors is approved for release to Betamax outlets. For purposes of clarification, therefore, "new arrivals" are titles thrown out by the studios within the last 6 months — which, ironically might be anything from "The Maltese Falcon" to "Mary Poppins". Here are some "new arrivals" not quite as dated:
BATES MOTEL — More of an emotional footnote than an actual sequel to the 3 "Psycho" movies inspired by the terrifying 1950's novel of the same name by Robert Bloch, this borderline thriller is decidedly wholesome and transparent enough for general family viewing. Bud Cort plays a one-time abused child driven into a mental institution by a mother who beats him and a sister who likes to dry-clean him on occasion. Placed by his psychiatrist in the care of an unlikely surrogate father in the person of convicted mass-murderer Norman Bates, the boy grows into manhood and later inherits Norman's ashes and his notorious roadside inn. But Cort's own earnest efforts to restore the old Bates into a respectable hostelry are repeatedly waylaid by eerie apparitions and dark omens, and he gamely decides to buck the odds or go down fighting.
CHOPPING MALL — The law-enforcement robot gone berserk is fast developing into a popular genre on the heels of the hit movie "Robocop". This is certainly among the more amusing examples, with a trio of laser-shooting, pincer-clawed shopping mall sentinels turned homicidal by a program malfunction. It's important to note here that the early going literally oozes with teenage bedroom shenanigans, which is a pity because the rest of the movie is outstanding kiddie fare.
BANG THE DRUM SLOWLY — Robert De Niro and Michael Moriarty star in tandem as a pair of big-league baseball jocks bound by a friendship that doesn't grow on trees. When alternate-catcher De Niro is stricken with a debilitating terminal illness, prized-pitcher Moriarty has his friend's playing contract annexed to his own, virtually guaranteeing the dying athlete a last season at bat. The inspiring storyline, superb characterization, and an intelligently-laidback screenplay combine for a memorable and unpretentious little film. De Niro's honky pinch-hitter must be seen to be believed.
KEEPING TRACK — Tandem-starrers have their good and bad days. Margot Kidder and Michael Sarrazin struggle unsuccessfully through this all-too-forgettable steeplechase of a modern intrigue. Meeting by chance on a night train from Quebec to New York, our two heroes are rather willingly drawn into a Canadian counter-intelligence plot to beat the Russian KGB to a biological microchip that can change the worldwide balance of power. And as though the very notion of a Canadian spy network weren't nearly incredible enough, Kidder and Sarrazin virtually kick sand in our faces with 90 minutes of the most lamebrained stunts and narrow escapes to come our way in many moons.
WHOOPS APOCALYPSE — The irreverent comedy attains wicked new heights (and depths) in this hilariously mind-boggling political spoof. A deranged English Prime Minister, a uniformed banana dictator, a barely-breathing Soviet Premiere, a chameleon-like terrorist, and America's very first woman president are locked in a hyper-paranoid game of musical chairs that eventually culminates in a mushroom shoot. Public crucifixions at Wembley Stadium, security aides punching little girls into unconsciousness, an economic recovery program forcing 10,000 Britons to jump from a cliff each week to create new jobs, and a terrorist plot to market whistling condoms ("they come in 7 different melodies, and so can you!") are only some of the highlights to this comedy of errors that often rings true. Prepare yourself for a flatulent evening!
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Cesare A.X. Syjuco, “New Arrivals” (page 1 of 1), The Manila Times, November 02, 1987
